The farktard boyfriend
God, save me.
Why am I reduced to such a pathetic and pitiful state?
Two messages from him last night wrote:
1. I understand why u angry with me.I have been this way all my life,even my parents dont ask me do anything anymore.Its really hard to change tt.Hope u understand.
2. Now exam comin,i dont wan wish to quarrel.if u still unhappy abt anything,pls keep it till end of exams.
It really hurts so much to have such a selfish fucktard boyfriend like that.
We haven’t really spoken or met since Friday morning. Almost everyone I know say I should just end this relationship for good. I’m really beginning to see the light.
ditzy or plain dumb?
Just tell me exactly how smart I am when I rushed off for my 10km run early morning, only to reach my start point and realise my damn champion chip (its a black plastic electronic timer which you attach to your running shoes for those who don’t know) is resting comfortably at home. WTF? After all that trouble and hassle taken in running to catch a cab, praying so darn hard for the taxi to clear the traffic lights and managing to reach the start point 5 minutes after flag off.
The run was also dampened by my flash player not having fresh batteries and hence failing to work!
So now, I’ve completed the darn race for women, but no finisher medal. Sobs. I want my medal!!!
Definitely not feeling victorious at all.
I want to hide away again.
I hate living.
A demanding over-achieving sister who proclaims herself Queen in the household, a don’t-give-a-rat-about-me asshat boyfriend who is really redundant in my life, a seemingly endless load of school work, a dried up joyless spirit in rising up to the world’s no end of fuckers/fucking things.
I surrender.
What exactly do I want in my life?
Prayer: God forgive me but I pray that You don’t let my meanie of a sister get her way all the time. So let her not succeed in her overseas exchange application. Lord, make my boyfriend regret for not cherishing me. Cos I am about to give up on that bastard. May he live with the vicious cycle. Ok, what sort of unholy prayer is that? Void it. Father, in your grace, do let me be a winner too. Thank you. Amen.
